This is why you should always call a colleague who has been let go
Having spoken to a number of terminated employees, Elsebeth Hauge, management adviser, knows exactly what the best collegial reaction is. Read her good advice.
It matters to the other person
And while it may seem like a small thing to you, reaching out has a huge impact on the other person, she explains.
"It has a great impact on your self-esteem and feeling of importance to the people you've worked with. Managers report getting an uncomfortable feeling going from, just a week ago, laughing together, running cool projects together, smiling and feeling glad to see each other at the office to a state of utter silence," says Elsebeth Hauge.
When the fear of involvement takes over
According to the management adviser, failure to reach out to colleagues who have been let go may be caused by fear of involvement.
"Many people may tell themselves that others are probably reaching out. Or they show misconstrued consideration because he or she might get even more upset if they mention it," she says.
Other people may think it's disloyal to the employer to contact a person who has just been let go by the management.
"They may also fear that it might happen to them next time, and so they just want to forget about it," explains Elsebeth Hauge. But, in her view, it's always better to reach out. Even if it's a colleague in another department.
"It's fine to just write them a message, telling the person that you're sorry to hear about their termination and asking how they're doing. And perhaps also that they are missed. Feeling missed can be really important," she says.
Never too late
Maybe you're regretting that you never reached out to your colleague when they were fired. But actually, it's never too late to react, believes Elsebeth Hauge.
"Even if it was years ago, you could still reach out. You could send them a message, explaining how you've just read this article and that you wish you had reached out back then," she says, emphasising that you don't have to suggest meeting up for a coffee.
"It simply means so much to hear this – even if it's a long time ago."
Elsebeth Hauge also believes that it's a good idea to talk about it among the colleagues who have stayed – instead of keeping quiet.
"So if management announces that Pernille has been let go, you could discuss how you feel about it. It's perfectly fine to say 'I was really surprised, I'm afraid it will be me next time' or 'I'm really going to miss her.' In other words, tell people how you feel," she recommends.
Maintaining dignity
It may help maintaining the dignity of the person who has been fired. Something which is also important to be aware of, according to Elsebeth Hauge. Because if instead of talking about it, we resort to gossiping about it secretly, we do the exact opposite.
"There's no reason to add insult to injury by whispering at the coffee machine about Pernille having had a falling out with her manager or whatever the reason for her termination might be. And if you hear others doing it, suggest instead talking about how you feel, so the focus returns to the persons remaining instead of being on conspiracy theories," she says.
And finally, Elsebeth Hauge recommends asking your manager open-ended questions.
"You can ask what it means for the division of tasks, whether the company will be hiring a replacement for the position or whether you should send a farewell gift. That is, open-ended clarifying questions about the future," is the advice from Elsebeth Hauge.
We need to move away from picture-perfect terminations
In Elsebeth Hauge's view, we've long avoided talking loudly about terminations. It therefore pleases her to see more and more people sharing the news of their terminations on LinkedIn. But there is room for improvement in terms of what the loss of your job could result in, she believes.
"In my experience, people are still posting pictures from a forest and writing how they will be going for long walks and having good coffee. And so the experience of being terminated is still being made to look picture perfect.
We need to practice talking about how it can also be rather lonely and that you may have a serious fear of what the future holds," says Elsebeth Hauge.